Overthinking Too Much?

Overthinking is something that many of us slip into without realising. Believe it or not, it's very common and there are many different things that can trigger it. It often starts with a worry, a difficult decision, or a feeling that something isn’t quite right — and before you know it, your mind is running through endless “what ifs”, replaying conversations, or imagining worst-case scenarios.

If you’re someone who feels stuck in your head, you’re not alone. Overthinking is something expressed a lot, especially during stressful times, and it can leave you feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and disconnected from the present moment. Let me just explore this a little more for you.

What Is Overthinking?

Overthinking isn’t simply thinking a lot — it’s thinking too much, in a way that becomes unhelpful. It often falls into two patterns:

1. Rumination

Replaying past events and worrying about what you “should” or “could” have done differently.

2. Catastrophising

Jumping to the worst-case scenario or imagining problems that haven’t happened.

Both patterns can create a sense of danger in the body, triggering anxiety and keeping the mind on high alert.

Why Do We Overthink?

People often overthink because:

• The brain is trying to protect you

Overthinking can be a survival strategy — your mind tries to predict outcomes to keep you safe.

• You’re dealing with uncertainty

When the future feels unclear, the brain tries to fill in the gaps.

• You’ve experienced stress, trauma or difficult relationships

The mind may have learned to stay alert as a way to avoid pain or disappointment.

• You hold yourself to high standards

Perfectionism can feed overthinking, especially around decisions or mistakes.

• You care deeply

People who are thoughtful, empathetic and sensitive often overthink because they want to get things right.

How Overthinking Affects You

While it’s completely understandable, overthinking can:

• increase anxiety and tension

• make decisions feel overwhelming

• affect sleep

• reduce confidence

• drain emotional energy

• keep you focused on the past or future rather than the present moment

You might find yourself stuck in loops where the more you think, the worse you feel — and the worse you feel, the more you think.

Practical Ways to Calm Overthinking

Here are gentle, grounding ways to help quiet the mind:

1. Notice the Thought Spiral

Awareness is the first step. Notice what is happening. Sometimes it is difficult to notice that you are ruminating or thinking about worse-case scenarios as we can get so caught up in them. However if you can stop and notice what's happening, say to yourself "hold on, I'm overthinking here! What's going on?"

2. Bring Yourself Back to the Senses

There are lots of useful grounding techniques out there, but here are a few that can help just get you back into yourself:

• feeling your feet on the floor - try drawing an imaginary line around them in your minds eye

• slowing down your breathing

• noticing 5 things you can see and say them in your head

This signals to the brain that you’re safe.

3. Give the Thought a Time Limit

If your mind keeps returning to a worry, set aside a “worry window” — 10 minutes later in the day where you allow yourself to think about it. Put the worry in a box, and set that time aside. Often, the worry feels less urgent by the time you get there.

4. Ask Yourself: Is This Helpful?

A simple question that can break the cycle. If the thought isn’t helping, gently let it pass.

5. Write It Down

Getting thoughts out of your head and onto paper can reduce mental load and give you clarity.

6. Focus on What You Can Control

Overthinking often focuses on the unknown. List the things within your control — even small steps matter.

7. Talk It Through

Sharing your thoughts with a therapist can help you understand the root of the overthinking and build healthier ways of responding.

When Overthinking Becomes Overwhelming

If overthinking is affecting your sleep, relationships, decision-making or daily life, it may be a sign you need support. Counselling can help you explore what lies beneath the overthinking and give you space to develop more compassionate, grounding strategies.

You don’t have to manage everything alone — support is available, and change is possible.

If You’d Like Support

If you recognise yourself in any of this and feel ready to work through your overthinking in a safe, calm and supportive space, I’m here to help.

You can get in touch to book an appointment or ask any questions.